Despair
by Niphrandl
Summary: This story takes place after Gandalf confronts the Balrog on the Bridge of Khazad-dûm and before the fellowship reaches Lothlorien. It is told from Frodo's POV initially.
1. Chapter 1

Title: Despair (1/16)  
Author: Niphrandl  
Rating: PG13

Characters: Gandalf, Frodo, Boromir, Aragorn, Pippin, Merry, Sam, Legolas, Gimli  
Summary: This story takes place after Gandalf confronts the Balrog on the Bridge of Khazad-dûm and before the fellowship reaches Lothlorien. It is told from Frodo's POV initially.  
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. I make no money nor do I receive any public recognition for writing this. This is just my bit of fan fiction. Thanks Easterlily!

Author's Note: This is a story that I had written some time ago. I am just reformatting and updating. I'm sure you will all enjoy it again as you did the first time around.

Despair Chapter 1 I couldn't believe what I was seeing! 

He had turned to face it. He stood on that bridge and confronted that evil creature! We could feel the heat emanating off it. The smoke was billowing up and around it like waves crashing against a cliff.

"Gandalf!" I screamed. I don't think he could hear me. The roar of the flames from that evil thing was deafening.

We all stood there starring; frozen in disbelief and fear.

"You...shall not...pass!!"

I heard him yell as he brought his staff down hard on the bridge. The creature advanced on him with a huff of superheated air. The bridge gave way underneath it with a loud crack. With a scream of rage the creature fell into the dark abyss below.

Gandalf breathed a sigh of relief and turned to join us. Our eyes locked momentarily, a small smile crossed his face. Suddenly he lurched forward, dropping both his staff and sword as he fell upon the bridge. He was being dragged backward toward the abyss, a look of shocked disbelief on his face.

I couldn't breathe; my heart was beating so hard in my chest that I thought it would crash through my ribs with every beat!

Then he too was falling.

"Nnnnnooooo!!!!!" A blood curdling scream filled the mine.

I realized it was coming from me! I started to run toward the bridge but was stopped by a strong arm.

Boromir's.

I struggled against him. I had to get to Gandalf! I could not let him fall with that creature!

I felt myself being lifted off the ground. Boromir placed me on his hip as easily as he would have done with a human child.

"Nnnnoooo!!!" I screamed again still struggling with Boromir.

"Aragorn" he yelled as he turned to run up the stairs; Orc arrows hitting the walls around us.

I was vaguely aware that the others were following us. I couldn't believe it! We were leaving! Leaving Gandalf behind! I struggled even harder against Boromir but he was too strong for me. I stopped struggling and let myself be carried away.

We turned a corner and I was momentarily blinded by bright sunshine. We were outside. The cold wintry air a sharp contrast to the heated furnace we had just escaped. We had made it out of the mine.

All except Gandalf.

Despair hit me then.

Boromir put me down. I started walking slowly over the snow covered rock. I did not know where I was going and I did not care.

Gandalf was gone.

As if from a great distance I heard Merry, Pippin and Sam sobbing. I could offer them no comfort, my heart was broken. I simply kept walking.

Gandalf was gone.

My teacher.

My mentor.

My friend.

Gone.

I felt the cliff in front of me rather than saw it. I was drawn to it. Gandalf fell, I would too. No more fear. No more heartache; just blissful, forgetful darkness.

"Frodo?", I heard Aragorn call me though the fog in my brain but I ignored him. I kept walking toward the open cliff.

"Frodo!" he called again closer this time. I stopped walking then. I slowly turned toward Aragorn. Then and only then did a tear escape my eye and slide down my soot covered cheek.

Gandalf was gone, what could Aragorn possibly want from me?!

TBC...... 


	2. Chapter 2

Title: Despair (2/16)  
Author: Niphrandl  
Rating: PG13

Characters: Gandalf, Frodo, Boromir, Aragorn, Pippin, Merry, Sam, Legolas, Gimli  
Summary: This story takes place after Gandalf confronts the Balrog on the Bridge of Khazad-dûm and before the fellowship reaches Lothlorien. It is told from Frodo's POV initially.  
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. I make no money nor do I receive any public recognition for writing this. This is just my bit of fan fiction. Thanks Easterlily!

Despair Chapter 2

"Frodo we must keep moving. We cannot stay here." Aragorn said.

I gave him a blank stare. Keep moving? How could he even think about continuing the quest now! Didn't he care! He must have known Gandalf for as long, if not longer, than I! If being a ranger meant not caring about your friends I wanted nothing to do with it or them!

He was taking over. Anger boiled within me. Gandalf was the leader of this fellowship, not Aragorn! I turned so as to confront him but he had already moved back to the others. Legolas and Gimli were helping Merry, Pippin and Sam to their feet. I took a deep breath to yell after Aragorn but was stopped by a searing pain in my chest.

The mine.

The cave troll.

The spear.

His weapon did not pierce me because of Bilbo's mithril shirt but I knew that it had at least left a bruise; maybe even a few cracked ribs. I took another deep breath, slower this time.

The pain was horrible.

Maybe I should say something to Aragorn?

No.

Gandalf died right before our eyes and he hadn't shed a tear! Why should he care about me? He was probably in a hurry to get to Lothlorien so he could be rid of us. Well I wouldn't hold him back! I steeled myself against the pain and lightheadedness I was feeling and joined the others just as they were leaving.

"Ah Frodo, good, come along". Aragorn said and patted my shoulder. I pulled away. He didn't seem to notice.

"We must move quickly. It will be night soon and we must find a safe place to set up camp." My anger flared again. Why did we have to leave? Why couldn't we have gone back and at least TRIED to save Gandalf?

The tears threatened to spill again, I could not believe Gandalf was really gone.

Aragorn took the lead with Legolas behind him, then us four hobbits with Gimli behind us and Boromir brought up the rear. We walked on in this order for a while in utter silence. Each of us lost in our own thoughts I suppose. I looked over at Sam who was walking next to me. Dear Sam. I could still see tears in his eyes. Merry and Pippin were in front of us. Merry had his arm around Pippins shoulders. Pippin was still sobbing softly.

I thought back to Bilbo's 111th birthday party. The fireworks that Gandalf had brought along were the most awesome ones I had ever seen. The old wizard was in his prime. He was laughing right along with the lads and lasses as he lit one after the other and when he was done with that he joined us in dance.

Pain brought me back to the present. The landscape was as desolate as I was feeling inside. Utter hopelessness was setting in. I did not see anywhere that would make a good place to rest. Let alone set up camp! Nothing around us except snow covered rock and a few hardy trees.

A wave of dizziness hit me. The pain in my chest was increasing and it was getting harder to breath. Sam steadied me. Loyal, helpful Sam. What could I tell him though? It would only worry him and slow us down if we had to stop just to take care of a few bruised ribs. I just smiled and said nothing.

A few moments later I heard Gimli rush forward. I must have been stumbling because Sam had his arm around me supporting me.

"Are you all right Master Hobbit?" Gimli asked.

I turned and nodded. "Just a little tired is all." I lied.

Sam gave me one of those looks that said he knew I was lying but he said nothing. I gave him another grateful albeit sad smile. I looked up to see Aragorn looking back at us. His expression was unreadable. I quickly looked away. He turned and continued the trek.

We kept walking for what seemed to be an eternity. The landscape was slowly changing to open grassland. The pain in my chest had become as a red hot poker jabbing me with every breath I took. I could hardly breathe as it was and the dizziness was becoming impossible to fight off.

I felt Sam take my arm. "Are you all right Mr. Frodo?" he asked me.

I turned slightly toward him to answer but found I couldn't. Darkness was surrounding me and I felt myself falling.

"Frodo!!" Sam yelled.

"Strider!!!" was the last thing I heard before a pain free blackness overtook me.  
  
TBC


	3. Chapter 3

Title: Despair (3/16)  
Author: Niphrandl  
Rating: PG13

Characters: Gandalf, Frodo, Boromir, Aragorn, Pippin, Merry, Sam, Legolas, Gimli  
Summary: This story takes place after Gandalf confronts the Balrog on the Bridge of Khazad-dûm and before the fellowship reaches Lothlorien. It is told from Frodo's POV initially.  
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. I make no money nor do I receive any public recognition for writing this. This is just my bit of fan fiction. Thanks Easterlily!

Despair Chapter 3 

I heard a buzzing sound in my ears.

Then pieces of conversation; I couldn't quite make it out. 

"...tell you..."

"...seemed dizzy..."

"...so pale..."

I felt my shirt being lifted up.

"...bruise.."

"...cave troll..."

"...should have checked..."

I opened my eyes and groaned at the pain. Merry, Pippin and Sam were kneeling beside me. My head was resting in someone's lap. I looked back.

Legolas.

Nausea hit me all at once, I tried to react but the pain stopped me. Legolas must have seen the look on my face and guessed what was about to happen. He quickly turned me onto my side just as I vomited. Merry and Pippin jumped back so as not to get soiled.

The heaving and gasping for breath sent new waves of pain through me. I felt myself break out in a cold sweat. As Legolas turned me over onto my back once more I muttered a weak 'Thank you'.

Sam brought up a cloth and wiped my face.

"Aragorn..?" I said weakly. Where was he anyway? Surely he would not abandon us here!

"I found a small stream up ahead" Gimli said looking around. "Hasn't Aragorn returned yet?"

"Just now Master Dwarf." Aragorn said. Everyone looked up startled by his sudden quiet reappearance.

"Athelas is scarce in these parts. Did you get the water?"

I couldn't follow the conversation any longer. The dizziness was back. I closed my eyes and tried to concentrate on something else. All I could see, though, was Gandalf falling. I opened my eyes again and the dizziness was there waiting for me.

"Frodo why didn't you say something earlier?" Aragorn had seen my eyes open.

I just turned my head and didn't answer. Aragorn sighed. He was wiping my chest with warm water. I could smell the athelas that was in it. I felt my breathing ease a little though I knew I was still breathing too fast and too shallow. It hurt to take a deeper breath.

"What's wrong with him?" Merry asked.

"He has a chest wound. That cave troll did some damage after all it seems."

"Will he be all right?" Sam asked.

"I will do what I can. He should have said something sooner though." I heard Aragorn reply.

I felt myself slipping into darkness again. "Aragorn...help me...please." I begged weakly "d..don't leave..."

He bent over me and smiled sadly. "I won't leave you Frodo, ever."

I looked into his eyes then. I saw grief and concern for a loved one. I had been wrong. He was grieving just like the rest of us.

"S...sorry" I heard myself say.

"It's not your fault little one" Aragorn said "I should have checked you more thoroughly before we set off again."

He didn't understand me. I thought to explain but I was so tired and the pain was still too much. I closed my eyes.

Aragorn placed his hand briefly on my cheek and said "It's all right Frodo. Try to sleep."

I let the darkness envelope me once again.

(Aragorn and Sam's POV)

"Aragorn, what's happening?" Sam demanded to know. Aragorn quietly led Sam away from Frodo. "He has some fractured ribs from that cave troll attack." He whispered. "I'm afraid his chest is filling with fluid. His body is trying to protect the lungs by placing fluid between them and the damaged ribs."

"Is that why he is having such a hard time breathing?" Sam asked.

Aragorn nodded.

"Is there anything we can do?" Sam asked with growing desperation in his voice.

"If it gets any worse there is something I can do, but for now we just watch him."  
  
TBC


	4. Chapter 4

Title: Despair (4/16)  
Author: Niphrandl  
Rating: PG13

Characters: Gandalf, Frodo, Boromir, Aragorn, Pippin, Merry, Sam, Legolas, Gimli  
Summary: This story takes place after Gandalf confronts the Balrog on the Bridge of Khazad-dûm and before the fellowship reaches Lothlorien. It is told from Frodo's POV initially.  
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. I make no money nor do I receive any public recognition for writing this. This is just my bit of fan fiction. Thanks Easterlily!

Despair Chapter 4

When next I became aware it was full night. The camp was quiet except for the pop and crackle of the wood on the fire someone had made. I could hear the quiet sounds of night birds searching for their prey. The breeze blowing through the leaves above my head was calming.

I moaned. The pain had not let up.

Sam was there instantly wiping my face with athelas water. It felt good against my hot cheeks. He was asking me something but I could not understand him. It was as if he were a great distance from me. I closed my eyes.

My thoughts went to Gandalf. I saw him confront the Balrog again. I saw him fall. Why did he have to die? I will be lost without him. It's as if everyone I care about leaves me.

My parents.

Bilbo.

Gandalf.

My thoughts were interrupted. Someone was lifting me into a sitting position. I opened my eyes.

It was Aragorn.

"Here Frodo, Drink this." He placed a cup to my lips. Whatever it was it smelled horrible. I turned my head refusing to drink it.

"It will help ease your pain Frodo" Aragorn said.

I could hear concern in his voice. I turned toward him. He would understand.

My parents were dead.

Gandalf was dead.

Bilbo had left me.

"Just let me die." I said and closed my eyes.

Sam gasped in horror. I gave him an apologetic smile, as near as I could manage anyway. Aragorn firmly grasped my shoulders and shook me. The pain was instantaneous! I flung my head around and glared at him.

"I will NOT just let you die!!" Aragorn yelled at me. "We all loved Gandalf; we are all grieving his loss! I will not let you give up Frodo!"

Tears welled up in my eyes, from the pain or his anger I don't know.

"Frodo" he said his voice softer this time, "I cannot let you die. You are my friend; I care about what happens to you."

I closed my eyes. The tears streamed down my cheeks. I thought he would understand. I was wrong. The cup was brought to my lips once again.

It was Sam this time.

"Please Mr. Frodo; you must take your medicine." I stubbornly kept my mouth and eyes closed. No Sam I thought to myself. No medicine this time. Nothing could take away the hurt I was feeling.

"Come Samwise." I heard Aragorn say. "Let's let him alone for now."

"But his medicine!" Sam protested. "Why won't he listen to us?"

"He is grieving Sam, let him be for a while." I heard them walk away. I lay there alone listening to the night sounds. I don't know when I fell asleep but I must have. When I opened my eyes it was morning. The sun was shining brightly and the cool breeze remained.

I could hear conversation and the clattering of pans. I smelled breakfast cooking. Bacon and sausage and roasted vegetables.

My stomach lurched and threatened to spill what little was left in it.

The thought of food was unappealing. I tried to sit up and was greeted with a white hot pain. The world dimmed around me and I heard myself scream.

"Lay back little one. Easy now, you should not have tried to get up."

"L..Legolas?" I asked weakly.

"Yes." replied the elf. "You really must take it easy. Now try to slow down your breathing. Take slow deep breaths."

I tried to take a deep breath. It caught in my throat and sent me into a coughing spasm. The pain! I could not catch my breath. I could not stop coughing. Legolas pushed me up into a sitting position and was patting my back. It wasn't helping though. I felt myself falling into a dark abyss. I didn't try to fight it. I just let the darkness take me.

Sam's POVI was helping Merry and Pippin with breakfast when I heard Frodo scream. I dropped my pan and turned just in time to see Legolas helping him to lie back down. I grabbed a cloth and some cool water and was running toward them when Frodo started coughing. It sounded terrible. It was weak and his lungs sounded as if they were full of water! Before I could reach them Frodo slumped over and stopped coughing.

"Legolas! Is he...." I gulped unable to finish.

"Its all right Sam" He replied. "He just passed out again. He is very weak." The elf was so calm it helped calm the panic I felt rising in me.

"I wish he would have taken that medicine that Aragorn prepared for him last night." I said.

Aragorn said he was just grieving. But we all were. It just seems as if Frodo is giving up. I cannot let that happen. I WILL NOT let that happen.

TBC


	5. Chapter 5

Title: Despair (5/16)  
Author: Niphrandl  
Rating: PG13

Characters: Gandalf, Frodo, Boromir, Aragorn, Pippin, Merry, Sam, Legolas, Gimli  
Summary: This story takes place after Gandalf confronts the Balrog on the Bridge of Khazad-dûm and before the fellowship reaches Lothlorien. It is told from Frodo's POV initially.  
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. I make no money nor do I receive any public recognition for writing this. This is just my bit of fan fiction. Thanks Easterlily!

Despair Chapter 5

I opened my eyes again and Aragorn and Gimli were standing over me.

"Sam.. where is Sam." I whispered.

"Sam is packing, we are moving out again soon" Aragorn said. "How are you feeling?"

"Pain" was my only reply.

Aragorn lifted me into a sitting position,

"Aaaahhhh!!" The pain was almost too much!

"Drink this" Aragorn said placing a cup to my lips.

I turned my head. I didn't want any medicine. I didn't want to get better this time. Aragorn turned my head so I was facing him again. "Drink this!" he said harshly.

I shook my head and made to push the cup away.

"This is why I asked you to join me Gimli, I knew that he would give me trouble."

I opened my eyes a little wider. What was Aragorn going to do? With a nod to Aragorn, Gimli grabbed my hands and straddled my legs effectively pinning me! How dare he! I opened my mouth to protest but Aragorn poured something into it. I quickly spit it out.

"NO!!" I said hoarsely.

"You have no choice in the matter" said Aragorn. He pinched my nose and tilted my head back. I had to open my mouth to breath. After a few breaths Aragorn again poured something into my mouth and quickly pushed my chin up so I could not spit it back out. I tried to struggle but Gimli held me fast.

"SWALLOW IT!!!" Aragorn yelled. I was quickly losing my air, I had no choice. I swallowed it. Aragorn let go and I gasped for air; glaring at both Aragorn and Gimli for such undignified treatment. Aragorn brought the cup up again. I shook my head. Aragorn pinched my nose again.

I heard Sam yell "HEY!, What are you doing?" Good old Sam, he would save me from this!

"Master Gamgee!" Gimli grunted. "It seems that Master Baggins is refusing to take his medicine." He nodded at Aragorn, "We are just helping him change his mind."

Sam looked at me and my heart sank. "Now Mr. Frodo, you know you need this medicine to get better."

"NO SAM!" I spat at him. I saw hurt and confusion cross his face. Then something else was there, indignant determination. He squared his shoulders and looked at Aragorn.

"Proceed Mr. Strider, sir." And Sam turned around and walked away.

"Sam!" I yelled in disbelief.

"Are you going to take this now?" Aragorn asked.

I shook my head. Why couldn't they just leave me alone?! Aragorn pinched my nose again. I held out for as long as I could before having to gasp for air. Aragorn poured more of that vile stuff into my mouth as soon as I opened it.

I swallowed quickly, I had no choice. I would have choked on it if I hadn't.

Aragorn waited for me to catch my breath and then repeated the process a third time. "There, that's the last of it." he said with some satisfaction in his voice.

Gimli released my hands and stood up. "You are more stubborn than any Dwarf I know!" he stated and walked off.

"Now" Aragorn said, "We will give you this medicine every couple of hours. You can take it willingly or we can do it the hard way again."

I turned my head away from him. He sighed and walked away muttering something about hobbits and mules. I was seething inside! How dare they treat me that way! They had no right! Hot tears streamed down my face. A few moments later Sam came back with a cup of water and a bowl of soup.

"Not a right proper breakfast but it is one, I reckon, that your stomach can handle."

"I'm not hungry." I said angrily not looking at him. "Just leave me alone!" Sam let out an exasperated sigh.

"Mr. Frodo," The tone in his voice caused me to look up at him. "I know you are grieving, we all are. I loved Gandalf too you know!" He set the cup and bowl down beside me and turned his back to me. "I'm sorry you got hurt an' all. And I'm sorry Gandalf....left us. But you have to snap out of it. I couldn't bear to lose you too!" Having said that Sam walked off.

My anger disappeared at that moment. It was replaced by the realization that I have been nothing less than selfish. What had I done? In my own grief I hadn't even stopped to think that they were grieving too. I wanted to apologize to them but they were all busy taking down the camp. I did the next best thing. I picked up the cup and bowl, with some difficulty, and finished off every last drop. The warm soup felt good in my stomach and the cool water was just what my parched throat was screaming for.

The medicine that Aragorn had forced into me seemed to be working. The pain in my chest had eased and I found it easier to breath; though the pain in my heart was as strong as ever.

I felt myself drifting toward the darkness. But this time it was different. This time it was a peaceful, restful darkness I headed toward. I was drifting off to sleep.

TBC


	6. Chapter 6

Title: Despair (6/16)  
Author: Niphrandl  
Rating: PG13

Characters: Gandalf, Frodo, Boromir, Aragorn, Pippin, Merry, Sam, Legolas, Gimli  
Summary: This story takes place after Gandalf confronts the Balrog on the Bridge of Khazad-dûm and before the fellowship reaches Lothlorien. It is told from Frodo's POV initially.  
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. I make no money nor do I receive any public recognition for writing this. This is just my bit of fan fiction. Thanks Easterlily!

Despair Chapter 6

"Frodo?" I felt someone gently shake my shoulder. "Frodo wake up."

I opened my eyes. It took a few moments for me to focus. Boromir and Gimli stood over me.

"We are setting off again and I will be carrying you." Boromir said.

"And I will carry your pack" Gimli added.

I did not protest. My chest still hurt but there was something else wrong. I couldn't pinpoint it but I put it down as the medicine being too strong for me. I couldn't fault Aragorn though, I said to myself. He was used to treating men not hobbits.

The world spun around me as Boromir lifted me up and I took a hissing breath as I felt something stab in my chest.

"Are you all right?" Boromir asked.

"Yes, I'm fine." I said. After my earlier behavior I did not want to cause any problems so I did not say anything.

The soup I had eaten earlier threatened to come up but I managed to force it back down. I felt a cold sweat break out again. Boromir didn't seem to notice. I had laid my head down on his shoulder so he couldn't see my face. As the hour passed I found I could fight it no longer. I felt as if I were breathing with only half my lungs.

"B...Boromir" I whispered. "Boromir stop.....can't breathe"

"What?" he asked.

He shifted me so he could see my face and my head fell back. He almost lost his grip on me. I didn't even have the strength to lift up my head.

"Aragorn!!" Boromir yelled as he laid me down on the ground.

I'm dying I thought to myself. I was vaguely aware of Sam calling my name. Merry and Pippin's voices were mere echoes in my ears. It was dark. Though I knew I still had my eyes open.

Fellowship POV

"Did you say something Frodo?" Boromir asked as he brought Frodo off his hip. Frodo went limp in his arms, his face had a bluish cast to it. Boromir called for Aragorn and laid Frodo down on the ground. Gimli placed a pack under his head for a pillow. The other three hobbits ran up to them.

"Mr. Frodo!" Sam.

"Frodo what's wrong?" Merry.

"FRODO!!!" Pippin.

Aragorn approached, "Boromir, what happened?" he asked.

"I'm not sure, he said something then went limp."

Aragorn took off Frodo's shirt and quickly examined him. "I feared this might happen" he said.

"Aragorn?" Sam asked hesitantly.

"Sam, his chest is filled up with fluid. His lungs cannot expand. He is suffocating."

"NO!" Sam said shaking his head. "You said there was something you could do!" Tears were streaming down his face.

Aragorn nodded. "Gimli, get a fire started. Legolas, help me prepare Frodo. I have to drain the fluid out." Aragorn stated.

Legolas situated himself behind Frodo so that he was in a semi reclined position. Aragorn placed a cloth over his chest and laid Frodo against him. As Aragorn was washing Frodo's chest Legolas spoke up.

"Aragorn are you sure you know what you are doing?"

Aragorn gave Legolas a wry smile. "Elrond is an excellent teacher."

Gimli approached, "The fire is almost ready" he said.

"Good" Aragorn replied and handed Gimli a pouch.

"Get a pan from Sam and boil these instruments for me." Gimli took the pouch and moved away.

"What you plan to do is dangerous under the best of circumstances Aragorn" Legolas said with concern.

"I know" Aragorn replied placing a hand on Frodo's brow. "Hold on just a little longer Frodo" he said.

"Yes Ringbearer", Boromir said to himself, "you must survive just a little longer."

Aragorn looked up toward the others. Merry, Sam and Pippin were standing in shocked silence holding each other; tears streaming down their faces. He looked back down at Frodo, his face had gone a darker shade of blue. His breaths were nothing more that short raspy gasps.

"Gimli! Where are those instruments!!" Aragorn yelled.

Gimli ran over with the pan of boiling water and instruments. "It takes time for water to boil Aragorn" Gimli stated flatly.

"I meant no harm Master Dwarf" Aragorn apologized. "It's just, Frodo has no time."

"No harm done Aragorn" Gimli stated. "Just get to doing what it is that needs to be done!"

Aragorn quickly grabbed a small very sharp knife out of the pan; using a folded cloth to keep from burning himself. He briefly made eye contact with Sam and made a small cut in the lower portion of Frodo's chest. Sam let out a strangled cry and made to run over to Frodo. Merry and Pippin held him back.

"No Sam," Merry said, "Let Aragorn work."

Sam stared for a few moments then buried his face in Merry's shoulder. Aragorn continued to work making increasingly deeper cuts in the one he had made in Frodo's skin. He stopped and dropped the knife back into the pan. He then grabbed a long thin tube that had been shaved to a point at one end. He inserted the sharpened end of the tube into the cut he had made pushing it slowly but firmly until he felt it break through into Frodo's chest cavity. He immediately let up on the pressure and angled the free end down toward the ground.

A vile looking liquid started to seep out of it and Aragorn let out the breath he had been holding.

"Now what?" asked Boromir?

"Now" replied Aragorn "we wait."

TBC…


	7. Chapter 7

Title: Despair (7/16)  
Author: Niphrandl  
Rating: PG13

Characters: Gandalf, Frodo, Boromir, Aragorn, Pippin, Merry, Sam, Legolas, Gimli  
Summary: This story takes place after Gandalf confronts the Balrog on the Bridge of Khazad-dûm and before the fellowship reaches Lothlorien. It is told from Frodo's POV initially.  
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. I make no money nor do I receive any public recognition for writing this. This is just my bit of fan fiction. Thanks Easterlily!

Despair Chapter 7

I could still hear the buzz of conversation. But I could not see anything nor could I make out any words. I felt as if I were floating somewhere between life and death. I felt myself being moved. I felt a cold liquid on my chest. In my mind I shivered. I felt a hand on my forehead and heard more buzzing conversation.

Someone raised their voice and then it went back down again. I was scared. What was happening to me? Then I felt a sharp pain in my side. It felt like the sting of a wasp! In my mind I screamed and tried to pull away but my body did not respond! The sting turned into a burn as it went deeper. Suddenly it stopped only to be replaced by a sharper pain. Something was being pushed into my chest! My mind reeled as I felt it break through.

Then I felt nothing.

No pain, no cold.

Just nothing.

After a few moments I noticed that I could take a deeper breath. And with each succeeding breath they became deeper until I could again take a full breath.

The buzzing conversation came to me again. I could make out words.

"...deeper..."

"...breathing easier..."

"...not...danger yet..."

My vision was coming back to me as well. At first just a blur of shadow and light. Then I could make out shapes.

Then..Pain.

I gasped and moaned. I felt a cool cloth on my forehead.

Someone talking soothingly.

I think it was Sam. I turned my head, yes it was Sam.

"Sam" I said.

He smiled broadly "Welcome back Mr. Frodo!"

I closed my eyes as another wave of pain washed over me. I felt something cool against my lips. I opened my eyes. Aragorn was there. I turned my head.

"I thought we were done being stubborn!" Aragorn said. I shook my head.

"Too strong...sick" I managed to say.

"Oh" Aragorn said apparently understanding my meaning. He left and returned a few moments later. Again the cup was brought to my lips.

"I made a weaker potion this time Frodo."

I smiled a little and drank every last drop. Legolas moved out from behind me and packs and blankets were placed behind me to keep me sitting upright.

"As long as that tube is in there he cannot be moved" Aragorn said. "So we might as well settle down for a while."

"How long will it have to stay in there?" asked Sam.

Aragorn shrugged. "As long as it is draining" he said and leaned back against a tree.

I closed my eyes. The medicine was taking effect and I was feeling comfortably numb. I was also exhausted from the morning's experiences. I quickly fell into a deep sleep.

I opened my eyes with a start. I heard something. What it was I don't know. I looked around. Everyone was sleeping.

Why wasn't someone on watch? Probably because it was still daylight, I told myself. I looked around again, nothing 'seemed' out of place.

Then I heard it again.

A low growl.

Predatory.

Hungry.

And close. I placed my hand on Sting. Thankful that someone, probably Sam, had left it within my reach.

I heard the growl again and my blood froze. It was coming from right behind me. I tried to call out to the others but my voice got caught in my throat. I slowly rose to my feet and turned around.

A WOLF!!

There was a madness in its eyes. It must have smelled the blood from the surgery Aragorn did. It started to growl again.

Low.

Gutteral

Threatening.

It sprang all at once! I felt its teeth sink into my throat! I heard myself scream!!

"Nnnnnoooooo!!!!!!"

"Mr. Frodo! Wake up your having a nightmare!"

Sam was shaking my shoulders and yelling at me. I opened my eyes continuing to fight the wolf. Then I realized it was Sam.

"You were having a nightmare Frodo!" Sam said. I collapsed back against the packs.

"A nightmare" I repeated breathlessly.

"Yes" Sam said.

"Oh, Sam. It was horrible!"

"Shhhh, its ok now. Your Sam's with you now. Nothing will happen to you."

Gimli walked over. "Is everything all right Master Gamgee?" he asked.

"Yes everything is fine. He just had a bad dream" Sam told him.

"Where is everyone?" I asked.

"Aragorn and Legolas are scouting the area. Boromir is resting and your two friends are preparing lunch." Gimli informed us.

"Lunch? I am hungry." I said before I even realized I was speaking.

Sam beamed. "Well" he said jumping up. "That is a problem 'I' can do something about!" and he trotted off before I could stop him.

"Are you sure you're all right Master Baggins?" Gimli asked me.

"I'm fine and please call me Frodo." Gimli smiled; at least I think he did.

"All right, Frodo, I will leave you to rest and help the others with Lunch."

As Gimli walked away I settled back against my makeshift bed; the memory of the nightmare making me shudder.  
  
TBC


	8. Chapter 8

Title: Despair (8/16)  
Author: Niphrandl  
Rating: PG13

Characters: Gandalf, Frodo, Boromir, Aragorn, Pippin, Merry, Sam, Legolas, Gimli  
Summary: This story takes place after Gandalf confronts the Balrog on the Bridge of Khazad-dûm and before the fellowship reaches Lothlorien. It is told from Frodo's POV initially.  
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. I make no money nor do I receive any public recognition for writing this. This is just my bit of fan fiction. Thanks Easterlily!

Despair Chapter 8Aragorn and Legolas returned just as we finished our lunch of mushroom soup, bread and dried fruit. Aragorn stopped short when he saw me sitting up.

"Well" he said. "I see I needn't have worried, you appear to be doing well."

I gave him a weak smile. "I was hungry and it is quite impossible to eat lying down." I said apologetically.

Aragorn laughed as he sat down and helped himself to some soup. "No need to apologize Frodo. It is a good sign that you are up let alone hungry! So how does the chest feel?"

"Still a little sore and this," I said pointing to my side "is becoming quite bothersome."

Aragorn nodded but said nothing. When he finished his lunch he turned to me and said "Shall we?"

I gave him a puzzled look. He smiled and pointed at my side.

"Oh!" I said "are you going to take it out now?"

"That remains to be seen. I need to examine you first." Aragorn said carefully lifting me to my feet.

"Sam prepare some warm water and bring us some clean clothes."

"Right away Aragorn." Sam said jumping up.

As I settled down against the packs Aragorn again asked me how I was feeling. "Is the pain in your chest better?"

"Yes."

Any trouble breathing?"

"No."

"Any pain in your side?"

"No."

"Any burning around the tube?"

"NO! Aragorn, what is this? Are you going to remove this or not!" I was getting quiet frustrated.

Aragorn removed the cloth Sam had wrapped around it to hold it still and inspected the skin around it.

"Doesn't appear to be infected. No swelling or anything..."

Just then Sam can over. "Here's the water and clean clothes you wanted."

"Good, thank you Sam. I need your help here."

"I'll do whatever it is that needs doing." Sam replied.

Aragorn had started washing the area around the tube. He spoke as he continued. "Frodo lift your left arm up over your head. Sam, sit beside Frodo and wrap your arms around him. Clasp your hands just under his arm." Aragorn watched as we did as he instructed.

"Good, now I am going to pull this out. Frodo I need you to take three deep breaths. On the third one I will pull this out. Sam, I want you to hold him still."

I turned my head toward Sam and gave him a worried look. I was anticipating the pain.

"Ok Frodo, take those deep breaths now."

I took the first one, Aragorn grabbed the tube.

I took the second one, he pulled.

I took the third one and he said "All done!"

I swung my head around "That's it?" I asked incredulously.

"It's out?"

Aragorn smiled as he placed padding over the site and wrapped a bandage around me.

"I hardly felt a thing! No pain or anything!" I said.

"I never said you would now did I." Aragorn said and gave me a playful soc on the chin.

I laughed when I realized he was having fun with me.

"As soon as you're up to it we need to get moving." Aragorn stated taking care of his things.

"We won't make Lothlorien by tonight like I had hoped and we cannot stay out in the open.

I looked away ashamed.

Aragorn gently placed his hand on my shoulder. "Nothing to be ashamed about Frodo" he said, "it wasn't your fault!"

"Legolas and I found a good place to make camp tonight but we must hurry if we are to make it by nightfall."

As Aragorn walked away I felt a cold chill go down my spine and shuddered. I looked up and saw Boromir staring at me.

"What is it Mr. Frodo?" Sam asked.

"That man, Boromir." I said. "I get an uneasy feeling about him, I can't quite place."

"Now Mr. Frodo, There's naught to worry about." Sam said helping me into a clean shirt. "I'll wager it's just because he is a warrior."

"Perhaps" I said to Sam. 'Perhaps not' I thought to myself.

We set out a half hour later. I insisted on walking; mainly because I did not care to be close to Boromir at all. The uneasy feeling remained. I kept it to myself though. I made the excuse that I did not want to be a burden to anyone. Aragorn agreed to let me walk on the condition that my pack be divided up and I not carry anything.

I agreed.

As the afternoon wore on into dusk I was beginning to regret my decision to walk. I was growing quite weary. I caught up to Aragorn, "how much further?" I asked.

"Not much farther" he replied. "Are you ge...."

"SHHHHH!" Legolas had stopped and was setting his bow.

Aragorn drew his sword, "What?" he whispered.

"YRCH!!" Legolas cried and let lose an arrow. A cry could be heard as the arrow hit its mark.

Boromir turned with sword dawn just as an orc came up on him. The orc never knew what hit him.

Us four hobbits also drew our swords ready to face whatever came at us.

Memories of the Mines went through my mind.

Suddenly arrows were raining down on us. I heard Pippin cry out. I looked over and saw him fall.

Just as I turned to run to him a sharp pain in my arm stopped me. The force of whatever it was that hit me knocked me off balance.

I was falling.

Explosion of pain in my head.

Bright lights.

Then, Nothing.

TBC…


	9. Chapter 9

Title: Despair (9/16)  
Author: Niphrandl  
Rating: PG13

Characters: Gandalf, Frodo, Boromir, Aragorn, Pippin, Merry, Sam, Legolas, Gimli  
Summary: This story takes place after Gandalf confronts the Balrog on the Bridge of Khazad-dûm and before the fellowship reaches Lothlorien. It is told from Frodo's POV initially.  
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. I make no money nor do I receive any public recognition for writing this. This is just my bit of fan fiction. Thanks Easterlily!

Despair Chapter 9

I came to myself a few moments later. I could still hear the sounds and cries of battle going on. Then I remembered what had happened.

"PIPPIN!!" I screamed. I started to get up but the pain in my head forced me back down. I sat up slowly this time and took note of my injuries. I had taken an arrow in my left arm.

I reached my right hand up and touched a lump on my head. It came back sticky  
with blood.

I looked around and saw a blood stained rock where I had fallen. That must be what I hit my head on, I thought to myself.

Pippin.

I looked to where I last saw him. He was still down, not moving.

I slowly got on my knees and, cradling my injured arm, crawled over to him. I looked around for the others but could not see anyone.

I scooted as close to Pippin as I could. He had taken an arrow in the chest.

Tears filled my eyes and spilled down my cheek. I placed a shaky hand on his chest. Relief filled me when I felt it rise and fall in an easy rhythm.

"He's still alive" I said.

I stiffened when I heard the sound of running feet. I turned and saw an orc advancing on us. I desperately looked around for a weapon. I had left sting where I fell and I could not see Pippins sword anywhere!

I did the only thing I could think of. I grabbed the arrow that was still in my arm and, with a yell, pulled it out. It was the only thing I could use as a weapon.

"We may die, Pippin," I said "But I'm going to die FIGHTING!!"

At the sound of my yell the orc hesitated briefly.

I managed to get to my feet. I stood on wobbly legs as the creature came closer.

Just as it got within striking distance it arched back, let out a scream and fell over, Dead. An arrow in its back.

I looked up. Legolas was running toward us, bow in hand. I reached out for him and collapsed as he grabbed me.

"Frodo your safe now" he said to me.

"Pippin..." I started to say and the world dimmed and went black once more.

Fellowship POV  
  
"mmph" Aragorn grunted as he slew the orc he had been battling. He looked around. Boromir was still fighting with one, Gimli has also just slew the one he had been fighting and Merry and Sam had collapsed to their knees, exhausted from their own skirmishes. Frodo and Pippin were no where to be seen.

He turned and caught a glimpse of Legolas running full speed back toward where they were first attacked. He followed after him. Merry and Sam saw Aragorn take off so they made to follow him. Gimli was assisting Boromir with his orc.

Aragorn stopped just short of where they were attacked. The scene making his blood run cold.

Pippin down with an arrow in him and Legolas cradling Frodo in his arms

Aragorn heard Sam and Merry coming up behind him. Sam gave out a yell as he must have seen what Aragorn had seen. Aragorn turned and grabbed them by their cloaks preventing them from going any closer.

"NO!" he said. They struggled against him, Merry crying "NO!" and Sam demanding to be let loose.

Aragorn saw Gimli and Boromir approaching. He physically sat the two hobbits down

"Stay here!" he commanded.

"Gimli, stay here with them and do not let them get up. Boromir come with me."

Both gave Aragorn a puzzled glance but did as they were told. Merry and Sam were hugging each other and crying. Not knowing whether their friends and cousins were alive or dead but fearing the worst.

As Boromir neared, Aragorn turned and pointed toward where Legolas was just lying Frodo down next to Pippin.

"It doesn't look good" he said.

Boromir remained silent and followed Aragorn as he made his way toward the three of them. Legolas stood and faced Aragorn as he and Boromir approached. The front of his tunic covered with Frodo's blood. His face drawn with weariness and grief.  
  
TBC


	10. Chapter 10

Title: Despair (10/16)  
Author: Niphrandl  
Rating: PG13

Characters: Gandalf, Frodo, Boromir, Aragorn, Pippin, Merry, Sam, Legolas, Gimli  
Summary: This story takes place after Gandalf confronts the Balrog on the Bridge of Khazad-dûm and before the fellowship reaches Lothlorien. It is told from Frodo's POV initially.  
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. I make no money nor do I receive any public recognition for writing this. This is just my bit of fan fiction. Thanks Easterlily!

Despair Chapter 10Seeing the bloodstained tunic Aragorn was at once concerned for Legolas. Legolas spoke before Aragorn could.

"They are still alive but both have grievous injuries."

"What about you. Are you injured Legolas?" Aragorn asked.

"I am uninjured Aragorn" Legolas said looking down at his clothing.

"It's Frodo.." Legolas began but Aragorn was already kneeling beside the hobbit assessing his injuries.

Boromir was assessing Pippins injury.

Both men had seen many battles in their lifetime and so were adept in the assessing and treating of battle wounds.

"Legolas" Boromir spoke "Locate our packs and bring them to us."

Legolas looked to Aragorn reluctant to leave the hobbits sides.

Aragorn nodded.

"We need some things that are in them."

Legolas gave a slight nod and left.

"Aragorn" Boromir said as soon as Legolas left "The arrow does not appear to have penetrated deeply. I think it was stopped by his ribs. I do not think it punctured his lung. He has bled a lot though."

Aragorn nodded completing his assessment of Frodo. "His left arm has been pierced by something. Blade or arrow I don't know. He also has a severe bump on his head that is bleeding quite a bit."

Legolas had returned with the packs and Aragorn was laying out the supplies he and Boromir would need when he heard Gimli give a shout. The three of them looked up and saw Sam and Merry running toward them. They had somehow outsmarted the dwarf and gotten away from him. Sam reached them first.

Breathing heavily he stated,

"Begging...your pardon...Mr. Strider...Sir." "Mr. Frodo needs me...that's a fact...and...there'll be no...keeping me....from him!"

Merry arrived and said "The same goes for Pippin!" He knelt down and took his young cousins hand in his own. He looked up at Boromir, "Pippins hand is cold! Is he....dead?" The last word a barely audible whisper.

Boromir placed a hand on Merry's shoulder "No Merry, they are both still with us but we must care for their wounds quickly or that soon won't be the case."

Merry's mouth dropped open and Sam collapsed at Frodo's head. Tears once again streaming down their faces.

"I'm Sorry Mr. Frodo" Sam sobbed. I shouldn't have left you. I should have stayed  
by your side!" He brushed a damp curl off Frodo's forehead.

Aragorn placed a clean cloth in Sam's hand, "You can help me Sam" he said. "Hold this over the cut on Frodo's head just firm enough to stop the bleeding." Sam nodded.

"Why does he look so pale?" he asked.

"He has lost a lot of blood Sam" Aragorn replied firmly placing Sam's hand with the cloth over Frodo's head wound. He then turned his attention to the wound on Frodo's arm.

Boromir was working with Pippin. He gave Merry a cloth and said. "I am going to pull this arrow out. I want you to apply pressure to the wound as soon as I do. You understand?"

Merry nodded not taking his eyes off Pippin.

"Boromir" Aragorn said quickly. "Be sure the barb comes out with it!"

Boromir nodded and grabbed the shaft of the arrow. "Ready Merry?" he asked and without waiting for a reply, he pulled. The arrow came out with a soft wet 'pop'. Merry was immediately over Pippin applying pressure. Boromir inspected the arrow. Relief on his face. "The barb is out." He said.

Aragorn turned his attention back to Frodo's arm. "This must have been made by an arrow. It went straight through. The bleeding appears to have stopped." He carefully cleansed the arm and wrapped a clean bandage around it.

"Now Sam, let me have a look at that wound on his head."

Sam carefully removed the cloth and moved out of Aragorn's way.

"Good, the bleeding has slowed down considerably. I don't think he will need stitches." Aragorn said. He grabbed a clean bandage and wrapped it around Frodo's head. He looked up.

"Boromir how is Pippin?"

"He is no longer bleeding. I think he will be all right once his strength returns to him. But what are we going to do about tonight? Surely these two cannot be moved!" Boromir stated.

Aragorn nodded. "That is true. Gimli, gather up some firewood and get a fire started, then join Legolas for first watch." Legolas started to protest standing watch with a dwarf but under the circumstances he decided to keep quiet.

"Merry and Sam you two set up the rest of the camp. Boromir you and Merry will stand second watch and Sam and I will take third watch.

Boromir and Aragorn kept watch on their small patients. It was going to be a long sleepless night.  
  
TBC


	11. Chapter 11

Title: Despair (11/16)  
Author: Niphrandl  
Rating: PG13

Characters: Gandalf, Frodo, Boromir, Aragorn, Pippin, Merry, Sam, Legolas, Gimli  
Summary: This story takes place after Gandalf confronts the Balrog on the Bridge of Khazad-dûm and before the fellowship reaches Lothlorien. It is told from Frodo's POV initially.  
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. I make no money nor do I receive any public recognition for writing this. This is just my bit of fan fiction. Thanks Easterlily!

Despair Chapter 11

I opened my eyes. It was hard to focus on anything. It was dark. I heard murmuring in the distance.

Where was I? What had happened?

Then it all came crashing back to me with the suddenness of a thunderclap.

The arrows.

The orc.

"Pippin!" I screamed as I sat up. I was immediately brought down again by an explosion of pain and dizziness in my head and my arm ached something awful!

A cool cloth on my forehead, a comforting touch on my right shoulder.

"Sam?" I whispered.

"No little one," Legolas said "we made Sam lay down to get some rest. How are you feeling?"

"Head, Arm, Hurts. Dizzy." I was finding it hard to put sentences together. The world continued to spin. I opened my eyes a little wider, "Sick," I managed to say before I turned on my side and emptied my stomach of what little was in it.

Legolas cleaned up the mess and washed my face without saying a word. I felt awful! I wished I was dead.

Dead.

Arrows.

Pippin.

"Pippin!" I tried to sit up again. Everything went dim and I fell back again.

"Frodo" it was Aragorn, "don't excite yourself. You've been badly injured and you must stay still."

I opened my eyes and tried to focus on him. "Pippin" I said, "where?"

"Pippin is here." he said. "He is injured but alive."

Relief washed over me and I relaxed. I wasn't sure when I had fallen asleep but I was startled awake by screams. I turned my head to see Pippin struggling with Boromir and Legolas.

"Peregrine! Settle down! You're all right, you're safe now!" Boromir yelled at him.

Aragorn must have been on watch because he came running into camp with his sword drawn when he heard Pippin scream. Pippin continued to fight until Merry went over and started talking to him.

"Merry" Pippin said with tears in his eyes. "It hurts so much!"

"I know Pip," Merry said with tears in his own eyes. "You must be strong though." Pippin pulled Merry close and whispered something into his ear. Merry sat up with a sad smile and said.

"Me too Pip; me too."

Aragorn gave him a questioning look. Merry just held up his hand and shook his head.

Gimli had been tending the fire. He now came over with a pot of hot water. "Thought you might need this Aragorn." He said.

Aragorn smiled and quickly mixed up an herbal tea for Pippin.

"Here you are Pippin, drink this it will ease your pain and help you sleep."

Merry helped Pippin sit up and gave him a small sip. Pippin balked and coughed.

"That tastes awful!" he said.

I started to laugh in spite of myself but it was immediately turned into a moan when pain flashed through my head.

"Ah" Gimli said, "It seems our other patient needs some as well!"

I looked around for Sam hoping he could save me from that fate. My hope disappeared when I spied him on the other side of the camp. Fast asleep. Poor hobbit must have been exhausted to be able to sleep through this commotion.

Aragorn had come up behind me and followed my gaze. "He'll not be able to help you now Frodo." He said smiling. "I gave him something to help him sleep. He needed to rest as well."

I looked up at Aragorn resignedly and took the cup. "Pippin?" I asked.

"He's going to be just fine Frodo, don't worry."

I nodded. A wave of dizziness washed over me and I would have dropped the cup if Merry had not grabbed it. He had come up so quietly even Aragorn was surprised.

"Pippin is asleep again so I thought I would come over and help you with Frodo," Merry said with a smile in his eyes. "I know how he can be about taking his medicine!"

"Good, I will leave you to him then." Aragorn said standing up. "I have some things to discuss with Boromir. Make sure he drinks every last drop."

"You can be sure he will," Merry said giving me a stern glance.

As soon as Aragorn walked away I gave Merry my saddest pout.

"That isn't going to work this time cousin." Merry laughed.

I shook my right fist at him, "Now don't take that tone of voice with me!" he said indignantly.

I started to laugh but the pain stopped me once again. I squeezed my eyes shut against it.

"What's wrong Frodo?" Merry asked his voice full of concern.

"Head...hurts!" I whispered.

"Right, then time for your medicine." Merry stated bringing the cup up to my mouth.

I drank it without further argument. Merry got up to leave but I stopped him.

"Pippin whispered....What?" I managed to say.

Merry looked around to make sure no one was listening then leaned down close to me and whispered, "He said he was scared and he wanted his mum and da."

I slowly nodded my head and said, "Me...too." I leaned back on the bedroll and closed my eyes and let sleep overtake me once again.

Merry's POVWhen Frodo leaned back and closed his eyes I made straight for Aragorn and Boromir. Something was wasn't right with Frodo and I wanted to know what. The two men were talking about setting watches and securing the camp when I approached them.

"Aragorn" I said.

He didn't seem to hear me.

"Aragorn!" I said a little louder. "I need to talk to you!"

Without turning his head he said, "In a minute Merry."

"NO, NOW!" I demanded "What is wrong with Frodo? Why can't he talk right?"

Aragorn gave me a surprised look and said "I'll be right back Boromir" without breaking eye contact with me. He led me away from the sleeping hobbits. Then he got down on his knees so we made eye contact. "I'm afraid he has a concussion Merry." He stated flatly.

"A con...What?" I had never heard that word before.

"A concussion, it's like he has a bruise inside his head. It causes dizziness, difficulty with vision and difficulty with speech."

I thought about this for a few minutes. "Will he get better?" I asked.

"It depends on how deep the bruise is. Sometimes it clears up after a day or two and sometimes it never clears up," was his reply.

I did not look at Aragorn then. I simply turned and looked to where my cousin's were sleeping. "Elbereth help them." I muttered. A tear slowly made its way down my cheek.

TBC…


	12. Chapter 12

Title: Despair (12/16)  
Author: Niphrandl  
Rating: PG13

Characters: Gandalf, Frodo, Boromir, Aragorn, Pippin, Merry, Sam, Legolas, Gimli  
Summary: This story takes place after Gandalf confronts the Balrog on the Bridge of Khazad-dûm and before the fellowship reaches Lothlorien. It is told from Frodo's POV initially.  
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. I make no money nor do I receive any public recognition for writing this. This is just my bit of fan fiction. Thanks Easterlily!

Despair Chapter 12

I awoke once again to screams.

My screams.

Someone was holding me down. I opened my eyes. All I could see were shadows. Someone was saying something but I could not make it out. It was like being underwater.

Drowning!

I started kicking and screaming again.

I was drowning! No. Not drowning, I can breathe. How can that be? I blinked a couple of times and tried to focus on a shadow right above me. Sam's face came into view.

"S...Sam?" I managed. My mouth felt like it was filled with cotton. I realized I was drenched from head to toe.

"What..?" I looked up at Sam.

"Mr. Strider says it was a seizure. He and Mr. Legolas went off to find some herb they say will keep it from happening again."

"Thirsty..." I said and tried to swallow.

Sam helped me sit up and held the cup while I drank; gulping the cool water down.

"Slow down Frodo or you'll make yourself sick again." He pulled the cup away.

I took a few deep breaths feeling a slight pain from my bout with the cave troll. I  
looked up at Sam pleadingly. "More?" I asked.

"All right," Sam replied "But little sips this time. Take it in slowly."

He brought the cup to my lips and I sipped until the cup was empty.

He helped me lay back down. I felt weak as a newborn hobbit. I closed my eyes  
and tried to sleep but found I couldn't.

It seemed as if sounds were getting louder. My head started to hurt more with the increased noise. I put my hands over my ears to try and block the noise out, but it didn't work. The noise increased until I could stand it no longer.

"STOP IT!!" I heard myself scream. Then my body went stiff and darkness swallowed me.

Sams POV.  
  
I looked up when I heard Strider come back.

He looked at Frodo and asked, "How's he doing? Has he woke up yet?"

"Yes" I replied "he was thirsty so I gave him something to drink."

Aragorn gave me an odd look. "I wish you hadn't done that" he said. "It could cause problems....."

We heard Frodo scream. He was sitting up with his hands over his ears. He looked like he was in excruciating pain. Then he threw out his arms and collapsed back on the bedroll. His back arched up and his arms and legs jerked spasmodically.

"Another seizure". Aragorn said as he ran past me.

I was rooted to the spot.

"Legolas," Aragorn said "help me, roll him on his side."

As Legolas did that Aragorn rolled up a piece of cloth and wedged it between Frodo's teeth. "That should keep him from biting his tongue." He said.

Merry came up to me, "This one looks bad" he said, "Worse than that first one!"

"What's wrong with him Merry?" I asked. "Why is he doing that?"

"I don't know Sam. It might have something to do with that bump on the head he got."

I watched as Frodo's body jerked with each spasm, I was overcome with despair. I started to sink to my knees. Merry helped me sit down.

"He's going to die, isn't he?" I said.

"NO, he isn't going to die! Aragorn and Legolas will help him." Merry stated.

I jumped to my feet then. "He is going to die! Look, his face is turning blue!!" I  
yelled. I ran at Aragorn. "Help him!" I yelled. "Do something!! He's dying!!!" Aragorn stopped me and held me at arms length. "We're doing all we can for him right now" he said. "Gimli, take Sam away from here!"

I let the dwarf lead me away. There was nothing I could do.

Frodo was dying and there was nothing I could do for him.

"He's coming out of it" I heard Legolas say.

I turned around and looked at them. Sure enough Frodo seemed to be relaxing.  
He wasn't jerking anymore. He was breathing, rapidly, but he was breathing all the same! His face was starting to pink up again. Then without warning, he vomited. All that he had drunk came back up in 4 great heaves. So that is why Aragorn didn't want him to drink anything I thought to myself.

"Is he going to be ok?" I asked hopefully.

"We'll do everything we can for him Sam." Aragorn said. "But right now it's up to him. Legolas go and prepare those herbs that we found while Sam and I get Frodo cleaned up."

Legolas nodded and got up. He picked up the herbs and walked away.

"I'm sorry Mr. Strider; I didn't know giving him water would harm him." I said.

"It's all right Sam. It's just that sometimes after a seizure like that people will vomit. It can be dangerous if they are not on their sides like we had Frodo." Aragorn said carefully unbuttoning Frodo's wet shirt.

"But don't worry, you did not cause this. It would have happened regardless."

I breathed a small sigh of relief. "Will it happen again?" I asked.

"I don't know Sam" Aragorn said. "If we can get Frodo to take those herbs that Legolas and I found, it should keep this from happening again. We'll just have to wait and see."

I sat back as Aragorn finished washing Frodo up. I looked at his face. It was pale but it bore a peaceful look like he was in a deep peaceful sleep. I prayed that that was just what it was.

TBC…


	13. Chapter 13

Title: Despair (13/16)  
Author: Niphrandl  
Rating: PG13

Characters: Gandalf, Frodo, Boromir, Aragorn, Pippin, Merry, Sam, Legolas, Gimli  
Summary: This story takes place after Gandalf confronts the Balrog on the Bridge of Khazad-dûm and before the fellowship reaches Lothlorien. It is told from Frodo's POV initially.  
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. I make no money nor do I receive any public recognition for writing this. This is just my bit of fan fiction. Thanks Easterlily!

Despair Chapter 13

Boromir's Discontent  
  
After bandaging Pippins wound I sat back and just looked at him. This one was getting to me. Breaking through what I though was an iron clad shell. A warrior could not afford to become involved with anyone. But Pippin was so innocent. More child like than the other three. He had worked his way into my heart during our travels. I was nearly undone when I watched him sobbing outside Moria. I knew we should not have gone that way!! We should have gone through the Gap of Rohan like I said. But what's done is done. Gandalf is gone and Aragorn seems to have taken over for him.

"What are we going to do now? Surely these two cannot be moved!" I said to Aragorn, knowing full well what his answer would be.

We would make camp right here.

Out in the open.

Visible for all to see.

I heard him laying out the schedule for the watches. At least he was smart enough to do that. I looked back down at Pippin and sighed. He had become like a son to me. He didn't have a chance to use what I had taught him about sword fighting. He was struck down almost immediately.

And what of that other one.

The Ringbearer.

Frodo.

It seems to be one thing after another with him. He'll slow us down. If it weren't for the fact that he carried the Ring.

The Ring.

Sauron's Ring.

The power it must possess! If I could only get that Ring. I would see Sauron destroyed!

"Its going to be a long night" I heard Aragorn say. It brought me out of my reverie.

What was I thinking?

Elrond was right. The Ring must be destroyed and somehow, someway Frodo must be the one to do it.

Though I still have my doubts about his ability to do it.

I checked Pippin once again and was satisfied that he was ok for the moment. I went to help set up camp.  
  
It was nearing dawn. Aragorn had just relieved Merry and me from watch.

"Where is Sam?" I heard Merry ask as I walked toward Pippin and Frodo.

"I gave him something to help him sleep, he was exhausted and refused to lie down." Aragorn said.

"Shall I stay or get Gimli or Legolas to help you?" Merry asked.

"No" Aragorn said. "Just try to get some rest."

Merry nodded and walked toward camp. I had found Legolas tending to the little ones. "How are they?" I asked.

"Neither one has stirred yet" Legolas replied. "I have just finished changing their bandages."

I nodded, satisfied that the Elf knew what he was doing. Pippin started to stir and whimper. Then he started screaming. He flailed his arms and tried to sit up. Legolas and I both tried to hold him down. These little ones had surprising strength!

"Peregrine, Its all righ, You're safe now!" I yelled at him trying to calm him down. Merry rushed over to him and talked soothingly to him. Pippin settled down and seemed to remember where he was. After he drank the tea Aragorn prepared for him and fell asleep again I just sat there and watched him sleep.

It struck me again how childlike and innocent he was. He should not be here! Elrond should not have allowed him to come. This quest was too dangerous! I sat back trying to ponder what fate might have in store for him, for me, for all of us.

My thoughts were broken when I heard Sam cry out. I hadn't realized he was awake. He was kneeling beside Frodo who appeared to be having another seizure.

"Help him!!" he pleaded.

I rushed over to Frodo and gently cradled his head so he would not injure himself more. Sam looked up as Aragorn approached us.

"A seizure" he said.

"I had hoped this wouldn't happen." He looked at me, "Boromir, can you handle this?"

I nodded, anger building in me. I was not dumb!

"Legolas, come with me I will need your help locating a plant." And with that they were gone. Frodo was starting to relax. The seizure was over. I grabbed a clean cloth and wetted it from my water skin. I gently wiped down his face and neck.

"Will he die?" Sam asked.

"No..." I started to answer. My hand struck something.

The chain that held the Ring.

That blasted Ring! Why must it be destroyed?

Perhaps if Frodo does die I can take the Ring and...... I dropped the cloth and buried my head in my hands. How could I think such thoughts! What was wrong with me?

"Mr. Boromir?" Sam placed his hand on my shoulder. "Are you all right?"

"Yes, just exhaustion taking its toll" I lied.

I got up and left Sam to care for Frodo. I walked over to join Gimli who had awakened and was stoking up the fire.

I heard Frodo scream.

I stopped dead in my tracks.

I dare not go near him again.

Something about that Ring. It seemed to call to me. And it was worse when I was near him. Could I trust myself alone with Frodo and the Ring? I silently prayed that I would not have find out.

TBC…


	14. Chapter 14

Title: Despair (14/16)  
Author: Niphrandl  
Rating: PG13

Characters: Gandalf, Frodo, Boromir, Aragorn, Pippin, Merry, Sam, Legolas, Gimli  
Summary: This story takes place after Gandalf confronts the Balrog on the Bridge of Khazad-dûm and before the fellowship reaches Lothlorien. It is told from Frodo's POV initially.  
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. I make no money nor do I receive any public recognition for writing this. This is just my bit of fan fiction. Thanks Easterlily!

Despair Chapter 14

When I woke up I saw Aragorn and Sam leaning over me.

"Wh..what?" I asked, I didn't understand why they were looking at me like that. I tried to sit up but found I was too weak.

"Just lie still Frodo. We'll get these wet things off you." Aragorn said.

"Wet?" I asked, I didn't remember getting wet.

"Raining?" I asked confused.

  
Aragorn smiled.

"No, Mr. Frodo" Sam said, "its not raining. You've been sick. Now just let me and Mr. Aragorn get you into some dry clothes."

I let them do what they needed to do. I was still confused though. I lay there trying to piece together the fragments of memory that were floating through my head.

The orc attack, Pippin getting hit with an arrow, Laughing when Pippin choked on the taste of the medicine I have had to endure so many times.

But there seemed to be gaps. So many gaps of time missing. I looked at Aragorn "Time...gone" I said.

He looked at me confused at first and then said "Don't worry Frodo, your memories will come back."

I nodded and closed my eyes. I did feel better in the new change of clothes. I felt a light tap on my shoulder, I must have dozed off. It was Sam.

"Mr. Frodo, Mr. Aragorn says you are to drink this." I closed my eyes and screwed up my nose.

"Now don't be actin' like that Frodo." Sam said. "You have to take your medicine or Aragorn says you will have more of them seizures."

"Seizures?" I asked "Why...can't...remember?" Sam nodded his head "I think so. Now drink your medicine." Sam helped me sit up a little.

I closed my eyes and gripped Sam's arm tightly as a wave of dizziness and pain washed through my head.

"Frodo!" Sam exclaimed. "What is it?"

"Head hurts and dizzy" I replied.

"That's to be expected" Aragorn said walking up to us. "You hit your head pretty hard when you fell. Now take your medicine and let's have a look at that arm."

Sam held the cup for me while I drank. I was surprised! It tasted kind of sweet, not bitter like the other stuff I had to take. After Sam laid me back down Aragorn took the bandages off my arm. I flinched at the pain as they were sticking to the wound.

"Sam, go get some hot water for me please?" Aragorn said. Sam left.

"Well Frodo, your eyes seem a little brighter today. How are you feeling?" Aragorn asked.

"Pain in head and dizzy" I repeated.

"Yes you said that. Can you move?" I looked up at him confused and tried to get up.

"No Frodo, don't try to get up just move your legs and feet for me."

I did.

"Good now open and close your hands."

I did.

"Good, now follow my finger with just your eyes. Don't move your head." Aragorn said as he held up a finger and moved it slowly from side to side in front of my face.

I followed it.

"Good" he said again.

"Here's your water Mr. Aragorn" Sam said setting a pot down beside him, "Mr. Gimli had already set a pot on to boil."

"Thank you Sam" Aragorn said dipping a cloth into the hot water and wrapping it around the bandages on my arm. "That should loosen them up a little." he said.

After a few moments he took the cloth and bandages off and looked at the wound. He lifted up my arm to look at the other side. "How does your arm feel?" he asked.

"Sore" I replied. He nodded his head.

"Looks all right so far. But we will still need to keep an eye on it." He wrapped a clean bandage around it. "Do you feel like you could travel?"

I shook my head, "Weak" I said.

"What if someone were to carry you?" Aragorn asked.

I thought about this for a while. I did not want to be a burden on anyone but I knew we could not stay here any longer. "All right" I said.

He nodded and went over to check on Pippin. I lay there trying to piece together the fragments of memory that were in my head when I heard Pippin cry rather indignantly.

"I CAN WALK!"

I smiled to myself. Pippin always did hate being babied! Aragorn laughed and bowed to Pippin.

"As you wish Master Took" he said. He turned toward camp.

"Boromir, Merry, Gimli, Sam lets get it packed up. We've been here too long. I want to be ready to move as soon as Legolas returns from scouting!" he said.

I fell into a light doze while the others were getting things packed up.  
  
TBC


	15. Chapter 15

Title: Despair (15/16)  
Author: Niphrandl  
Rating: PG13

Characters: Gandalf, Frodo, Boromir, Aragorn, Pippin, Merry, Sam, Legolas, Gimli  
Summary: This story takes place after Gandalf confronts the Balrog on the Bridge of Khazad-dûm and before the fellowship reaches Lothlorien. It is told from Frodo's POV initially.  
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. I make no money nor do I receive any public recognition for writing this. This is just my bit of fan fiction. Thanks Easterlily!

Despair Chapter 15

With Gimli's help Aragorn had fashioned a liter to carry me on. He thought I would travel better lying down than being carried on someone's hip. I agreed with him as just sitting up to drink the tea brought on waves of dizziness.

Legolas had just returned. "There is a good place to make camp about a days walk from here." He told Aragorn.

"I had hoped we would make Lothlorien by tonight." Aragorn said. Legolas shook his head.

"Perhaps if we were to travel through the night but the injured ones will not be able to travel fast or far."

"You are right my friend." Aragorn agreed.

As Aragorn and Legolas were talking Sam and Merry were helping Pippin and myself get ready to travel. I laid back on the liter with Sams help.

"Are you comfortable Mr. Frodo?" Sam asked.

I nodded.

"Do you want a blanket?"

"No thank you." I replied. I was feeling quite warm at that particular moment and put it down to embarrassment at having to be carried. I hated being a burden and it seemed that the further into this quest we went the more of a burden I became.

My worries were made worse when Sam said, "Me and Mr. Merry will be carrying you today."

It was one thing to be carried by Aragorn or Boromir. They were big men. I hardly weighed more than a human child I supposed. But to my friends I would be quite heavy. As if reading my thoughts Sam said, "Don't you worry none Mr. Frodo, you'll be up and on your own two feet soon enough." I smiled.

Aragorn came up to us just then.

"How are things going here?" He asked.

"Almost ready" Said Merry.

"Just got Mr. Frodo settled. "Said Sam.

"Good, we will be setting out soon." He turned to Pippin.

"Are you sure your able to walk?"

"Yes I'm sure." Pippin Stated.

"All right but you tell me if your chest starts to bother you at all." Aragorn said remembering what happened to Frodo.

"Ok" Aragorn said turning around. "Lets head out."

Merry and Sam slowly lifted me up off the ground. Pippin walked slowly beside us. With the gentle bouncing of the liter and the droan of my friends chatter I soon found my self getting sleepy. I closed my eyes and fell into a deep sleep.

I awoke to my name being called.

"Mr. Frodo, it's time for your medicine." Sam repeated. I opened my eyes to see not one but two Sams. I closed my eyes tight and opened them again.

Still two Sams.

"What's wrong Frodo?" Sam asked concern rising in his voice.

"Two." I said.

"Two?" questioned Sam. "What do you mean two. Two what?"

"Two...You." I said closing my eyes again.

"Two of me? You see two of me?" Sam asked. I nodded.

"Aragorn!" Sam called out "Something's wrong with Frodo!"

Aragorn came over "What is it Sam?"

"Frodo says he sees two of me!" Aragorn kneeled down and placed his hand on my arm.

"Frodo open your eyes."

I did blinking several times before looking at him.

"Frodo can you see me?" He asked.

"Two." I said. He sighed.

"Close your eyes again."

I did.

"Now open only one. What do you see?"

I looked around "You...Sam."

"Ok, now close that eye and open the other one. What do you see?"

"Same." I said.

"Good now slowly open your other eye so both eyes are open." Aragorn said.

I slowly opened my other eye and waited a few moments before looking at either one.

"Frodo?" Aragorn said. I looked at him. "What do you see?"

"One." I said relieved.

Sam let out a breath he had been holding.

"Ok" Aragorn said "you'll be just fine. How does the head feel? Any pain?"

"Little...Better." I said. "Any dizziness?" he asked. "Some" I replied.

Aragorn just nodded. "Sam make sure Frodo drinks all that tea."

"I will" replied Sam "but what is wrong with Frodo?"

Aragorn looked at him. "It sometimes happens when there has been a head injury such as what Frodo received. It cleared up right away so there is nothing to worry about."

With that Aragorn walked off to help the others. Sam helped me sit up slowly and fed me the tea.

TBC…


	16. Chapter 16

Title: Despair (16/16)  
Author: Niphrandl  
Rating: PG13

Characters: Gandalf, Frodo, Boromir, Aragorn, Pippin, Merry, Sam, Legolas, Gimli  
Summary: This story takes place after Gandalf confronts the Balrog on the Bridge of Khazad-dûm and before the fellowship reaches Lothlorien. It is told from Frodo's POV initially.  
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. I make no money nor do I receive any public recognition for writing this. This is just my bit of fan fiction. Thanks Easterlily!

Despair Chapter 16

After I had finished the medicinal tea and Aragorn had changed mine and Pippin's bandages we set out again. Merry and Sam were again carrying me. Pippin was walking beside me holding my hand. He must have been feeling better because he was regaling me with stories of his and Merry's misadventures at Brandy Hall. I was beginning to feel drowsy from the medicine and soon found myself lost in dreams of home. When I next awoke the company had stopped for lunch.

"How are you feeling Master Baggins?" asked Gimli.

"Hungry" I replied with a smile.

I heard Sam cry out

"He's awake?"

He came over with a cup of warm broth and a few slices of apple. "Beggin your pardon Mr. Frodo, but Strider would not let me wake you up when we stopped. He said you needed your rest. How are you feeling?"

"Fine Sam" I replied. "Hungry."

Sam smiled and sat down next to me preparing to feed me lunch. I stopped him with a light touch on his arm. "Do..Myself this time." I said.

"Are you sure Mr. Frodo?"

I nodded.

Sam put a piece of cloth around my neck to act as a napkin then handed me the broth. Then he sat back and watched me eat, making small talk the whole while.  
  
When lunch was finished Aragorn again checked the bandages. He determined that Pippin was healing nicely and would no longer need bandages. My wounds, however, were still weeping so they were rewrapped.

We set off again toward the spot where we would make camp for the night. Aragorn and Boromir were carrying me this time to give Merry and Sam a break and Legolas was leading the company toward the spot he had scouted out.

Merry, Sam and Pippin were walking just behind us quietly chattering among themselves. I looked up at Boromir and saw him looking down at me with an almost hungry look in his eyes. I became frightened, this man scared me. When he noticed me looking at him he cleared his throat and looked away.

'He wants the Ring' I thought to myself. A pang of jealousy ran through me at that thought. I reached up and placed my hand over the pocket it was in.

'He can't have it! It's mine!'

Just then Boromir misstepped and jostled the liter. I shuddered as if waking out of a nightmare.

"I'm sorry Frodo, are you all right?" Boromir asked Aragorn was looking back at him.

"I'm fine" I said and we continued on our way.

We reached the camp site just as the sun was setting. I was gently set down under a large tree. Sam came up to me.

"You just rest here Mr. Frodo, the rest of us will set up came and I will bring back something to eat."

"All right Sam" I said and smiled at him.

He smiled back and turned to help with camp.

A few moments later Pippin came over and sat down heavily. I looked at him, he was pouting.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"AW!! Aragorn is acting like a mother hen! He won't let me do anything to help!"

I started to chuckle.

"Yeah, Mother hen." I said and started clucking like a chicken. Pippin gave me a surprised look and we both burst out laughing. This elicited strange looks and smiles from the rest of the company.  
  
It was well after dark when we finished supper. Aragorn again checked Pippin's wound and changed my bandages.

"You are both healing quite well" he said. "I suggest we get to sleep right away and get an early start tomorrow. We will reach Lothlorien by nightfall."

After the watches were set, the camp settled down for the night. I was awakened during the night with an uncomfortable feeling of being watched. I looked around expecting to see Boromir watching me. What I saw scared me even more.

Two pinpricks of light in the underbrush.

'Gollum' I said to myself.

I heard a soft hiss and then they disappeared.

I caught a movement out of the corner of my eye. It was Aragorn. He was stealthily approaching the spot where the lights had been.

I sat up to say something and Aragorn quickly quieted me with a finger to his lips. Then he disappeared into the night. He came back a few moments later.

"Gollum?" I asked.

"Yes" he replied. "He has been following us for a couple of days now. I have been trying to snare him but he is too quick."

My hand went to my vest pocket.

"Do you think he will try to take the Ring?" I asked.

"He wants it, there is no question about that. I think that as long as you are with others he won't dare try anything. Now try to get some sleep Frodo, we travel nonstop tomorrow."

The morning dawned bright and clear. I could hear birds singing. A sound none of us had heard since leaving Rivendell. We ate quickly, then Pip and I chatted quietly while the others took care of camp. We set off as soon as that was done. We continued walking throughout the morning. True to his word, Aragorn would not let us stop for anything. We snacked on dried meat and fruit along the way. Then just after the noon hour Aragorn stopped and pointed to something in front of us.

There is was.

Lothlorien.

The Golden Wood.

We had made it at last.

The End 


End file.
